The missing piggy in the rhyme: This fat piggie ate and ate until there was none

Back again!


The picture on the left is pretty much what im feeling like right now. I feel disgusting and sick and ive been beeing sick the whole of this afternoon on purpose because i dont want to be fat and look like a walking lard block!

This morning i had no choice but to get up early due to the fact my tesco order was supposed to arrive. I got dressed at 8am then dosed off before it arrived at 11am. I managed to get lots of jelly and hot chocolate. When i went back upstairs i got a seering sharp headache quite different to the dull pain of a normal headache. So i took some syndol and tried to get back off to sleep for a little while because it was the only way to get relief from the headache. When i woke up again it was 2pm. The headache was still there which worried me slightly but i decided i couldnt stay in my bed any longer.

I did the necessary jobs around the house then came back up to my room to go on the computer for a bit. I felt good for not having anything so far to eat. But i had ordered chocolate brazil nuts and a roses tin to keep. I wont make excuses or apologies for the fact i then binged and purged it all. I cant because i think an excuse only counts when theres exceptional circumstances and i do it so often that an excuse doesnt cover it. I did it and im not proud of it, but as long as i didnt ingest calories thats all i care about.

I spent the rest of my afternoon slowly making sure i purged it all up. Eventually my family came back but my parents have been out a few hours and im hoping i can go to sleep before they come back wanting tea . My stomach is so achy and i hurt all over. I just want to sleep it off and hope that it doesnt have too much effect on my weight. Im taking the 72 hour pill still and you can lose up to 14lbs in 3 days on it so im hoping it will at least curb the effects of my binge/purges.

So, due to this strange day, there's not much point in doing a calorie and exercise section because ive not 100%ly ingested anything today and yet ive binged/purged so i have little idea how much ive actually taken in. Also im still out of action when it comes to exercise due to being ill at the mo which is really getting on my nerves.

Im just feeling generally fat - this is not a good thing when im so near to my goal. From how much i weighed this morning, im only 2lbs off being another BMI level down! And 11lbs off of my halfway point!

I must go now as i want to get to sleep and cry off my painful stomach. I want to tear it out so much!

* Poppy *